No self control.

I have NO self control.

 I hit DD today. I knew I shouldn't have. I told myself not to. My 12 yr old told me not to. But I still did it.

 I said it was a "first day back on the full time mom job" reward (hubby has been home for 2 weeks making my school drop offs and pick ups easy). Stupid, it was a poor choice. Then I gave myself a ton of different reasons not to exercise. Yesterday I did NOT run - I said, oh it's raining and I don't want to get my new shoes dirty (why did I buy them then?!) I said, oh it's too late. I don't really feel that good. I've already ruined the day anyway with bad eating. The kids are cranky. I just had reason after reason not to. So I went to bed feeling like crap and I woke up feeling like crap.

I FEEL LIKE CRAP WHEN I EAT BAD!! 

So why do I keep doing this?

I wish I could answer that.

Today after my sugary breakfast of carb death, I came home and I started again with reasons not to work out. But then I went in the bathroom and remembered I had bought new workout clothes. So I tried those on, then I was like OK, just do it. You'll get into it once you start. So I went back, got the workout videos on and I DID get into it. I said 3 but I ended up doing 6! That's about 20 minutes of workout videos and another maybe 5 or 10 in just my "circuit". Which is elevated push ups, jumping jacks, knee-to-elbow crunches and front & side leg kicks (10 of each repeated twice). Then I did some ab workouts (until I had a spasm in my stomach muscles, ouch!). Then my girls came over and I "lifted" them like a weight. They loved it lol! So hey, I was lifting 24 and 29 pounds, ha! Afterwards I'm always so happy I did it. I feel great! Now I'm ready to tackle laundry and dirty houses and poopy diapers (ok, I'm never ready for that), but I'm ready for the day now.

I think I need to start working out before my kids get up. Maybe hit bed earlier and try to get up half an hour earlier and workout before I wake the kids. If I could feel like this at 7am, I'd be set!!

My fitbit said I have burnt over 700 calories so far today and I AM going to run today. Getting up and starting that gets me going. I need to. I feel SO good when I'm working out. I wake up full of energy and feel good all day. The last few days of doing nothing and eating bad I've been waking up groggy and just blah. I hate that. 

Debating fasting for lunch because I did over-calorie, over-carb, over-fat breakfast with donuts. But I am a little hungry so... we'll see. Sugary foods leave you hungry. It's their mission. Make you  hungry faster so you eat MORE. Evil. I have a lunch left over from dinner though if I do decide to - jalapeno popper stuffed chicken with green beans and salad.